Interview with Taniesha Burke about the journey of parenting

We teamed up with Dr. Taniesha Burke, mother of a tween, Certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator, Developmental Psychology Researcher and Lecturer, who’s giving a workshop at our Unicorn Brunnenviertel event location. She helps parents to build healthy, resilient, connected families, and to find joy in their parenting journey no matter the circumstances.
Find out more about her program in the following interview.

1.    On March 30th, 2019 you will host an event at Unicorn. What is the background behind this event and why did you chose Unicorn as your event location?  

The workshop is a Positive Discipline Parenting workshop. Positive Discipline is a set of parenting tools that encourage parents to be kind and firm. The overall objective is to maintain a sense of belonging and connection while teaching children social and life stress and to use their power constructively. 

Many parents struggle with either being too firm, which is parenting without kindness and involve punitive strategies such as shame, humiliation, withdrawal of privileges, or spanking. Others are kind but not firm which leads to permissiveness, that is, allowing their children to do as they please. The objective of the workshop is to teach parents how they can achieve both kindness and firmness.

I chose Unicorn to host my workshop because of their exceptional reputation of being client-oriented in providing their services. So far I have not been disappointed with the service. The staff has been supportive, patient and helpful with all the elements of executing a successful workshop. 

2.    Your mission is to support families and help them grow a healthy relationship to their children. Can you briefly explain this to us further?  

Yes absolutely, parenting is one of those experiences we have as adults that do not come with a manual. It is a huge responsibility and has long-term effects on our children and society as a whole.

I originally started my career as a developmental psychology research scientist. My research focuses on parent-child relationships. The process of research was fun, but it was not fulfilling because I realized that many of the research findings are stored in university libraries or expensive journals far away from the population that needs them the most. 

I decided that it was best to share the latest research to parents through coaching programs and parenting workshops. I wanted to support parents in gaining the confidence and knowledge they need to raise and discipline their children in a way that fosters the development of crucial life skills while maintaining a strong, healthy loving relationship from infancy to adulthood. 

The tagline for my business is, “the future begins with the family”. If the family is healthy, the children are healthy, and society benefits. If we heal and support the family, we heal society. My mission is to support every family on that journey

3.    What are your three top tips for successful parenting?  

My top tips for successful parenting? I think Berliners should attend the workshop to learn in detail. But in general, to be successful in parenting, I believe there are several things to consider.

1.    Parenting has more to do with us than our children. We all bring our childhood conditioning, trauma, and fears into our interactions with our children. The environment we create for our children plays a significant role in who they will become. To master parenting, parents first need to master themselves. That involves healing their childhood wounds, not parenting from a place of fear or wanting to live their childhood dreams through their children. 

2.    Focus on building and maintaining a healthy attachment relationship with our children. All human beings have an innate need for connection and a sense of belonging. When our children do not experience that with us, they go elsewhere to fulfill that desire, and often that is their peer group. The peer group is at the same developmental stage and maturity as our children, which means they are not in a position to support and provide for our children’s needs, and that could lead to a disaster. Our effort as parents should be to build a strong relationship, which is even possible during the adolescent years. With a healthy and stable relationship, we have a more significant influence on the decisions our children make

3.    Our parenting strategies must be effective long-term. Meaning that they must be teaching our children life skills such as critical thinking, decision-making, problem-solving, emotional regulation, moral development, and emotional intelligence. When our parenting strategies are effective, they adequately prepare our children for a life in which they feel competent and capable of making a valuable contribution to society. 

Do you want to find out more about that topic? Be a part of Taniesha Burke’s workshop: Saturday, March 30, 2019